youhavetobeshipping:

best response ever

streeter:

I’m glad the portrait of Ben Franklin stayed the same on the new $100 bill. There’s something about his slight, tight frown, the paternal hint of disappointment in his eyes and those pursed, sealed lips that seem to say, “I don’t approve of what you’re doing, but I can’t stop you from rolling this banknote into a straw and ripping a fat rail of white lightning in the Buffalo Wild Wings handicapped bathroom stall, you goddamn beautiful disaster.” 

streeter:

I’m glad the portrait of Ben Franklin stayed the same on the new $100 bill. There’s something about his slight, tight frown, the paternal hint of disappointment in his eyes and those pursed, sealed lips that seem to say, “I don’t approve of what you’re doing, but I can’t stop you from rolling this banknote into a straw and ripping a fat rail of white lightning in the Buffalo Wild Wings handicapped bathroom stall, you goddamn beautiful disaster.” 

floozys:

floozys:

okay but

image

modern Morticia Addams 

 (x)

shouldnt:

THE FACT THAT THE AMERICAN PEDIATRIC SOCIETY TOLD AMERICAN SCHOOL SYSTEMS THAT TEENS SHOULD NOT BE UP BEFORE 8:30 AND ONLY 15% OF SCHOOLS LISTENED ANGERS ME SO MUCH

always-hex-cetera:

I think the only consistent punctuation on this site is the exclamation point in panic! at the disco

stunningpicture:

They call him Bagel Jesus. He takes the old bagels from work and distributes them to the hungry on the street. GGG right here!

stunningpicture:

They call him Bagel Jesus. He takes the old bagels from work and distributes them to the hungry on the street. GGG right here!

davebowie:

420goku:

davebowie:

stop idolizing pasty white lizard men 2k14 

your url is a derivative of david bowie the ultimate pasty white lizard man

i was going to try and respond to this but you know what????? he is. i fucked up. i fucked up.

thatsthat24:

lovejoyjohnlock:

motherfuckinoedipus:

janemba:

soujaboymeetsworld:

jackanthonyfernandez:

thechanelmuse:

Meet Cory Nieves. He’s a dapper, 10-year old CEO of Mr. Cory’s Cookies who started his own booming cookie business in an effort to help his mom buy a car after moving from NYC to New Jersey in 2009.

!!!!!! COOKIE CEO !!!!!!!

this is the best post on tumblr ever!!!

What the fuck

he applied cookie clicker to real life

Living the dream, man.

Can I meet this kid?

snickidoodle:

d0nn0:

beyoncevevo:

there needs to be a month between august and september 

october???

son i have news for you

tuc-ficprompts:

malicemidnight:

sapphirebones:

jaacknasty:

Probably the best 6 seconds ever. 

i fucking lost it

fUC K

OMG IM LAUGHING SO HARD RN HIS FACE WAS ONE OF PURE TERROR OHMYGOD

gasolinefamily:

He comes to cuddle every single morning.